Update: Unguessed ones in bold, with the albums they come from.
I’ve borrowed this idea from Alan’s This Moment, because it was great fun. The challenge he set on his blog was to identify the title and artist of the songs, and post answers in the comments. I’ll mark the lines as people identify them. The same rules apply: no Googling the lyrics; Googling a song title when you can’t
remember the name of the band, or the name of the album when you can’t remember the title of the song, is ok, but if you were wrong you can’t submit the correct answer. It’s a question of honour. Good luck! They’re not wilfully obscure – in fact some are chart hits. If you get the others, we both have the fuzzy feeling of ‘Oh, someone else likes that!’
1. You promised me that the ending would be clear
You’d let me know when the time was now
David Bowie: Bring Me the Disco King (Jim T)
2. I think I’m sophisticated, cause I’m living my life like a good homo sapien
The Kinks: Apeman (Lindsay)
3. The big man arrives, Disco dancers greet him
Plainclothes cops greet him
Small town, big man, fresh lipstick glistening
Joni Mitchell: Edith and the Kingpin (Hissing of Summer Lawns)
4. I hold you in my arms, yeah that’s when it starts
I seek faith in your kiss and comfort in your heart
Bruce Springsteen: Worlds Apart (The Rising)
5. Naked as sin, an army towel wrapped around my belly
Sensational Alex Harvey Band (or, if you like, Scott Walker): Next (ill man)
6. Trust me, I’m a doctor, a specialist in the ailments of the actress
Trust me, I’m a doctor, and you’re suffering from a rare form of attractiveness
Trust me if I seem to touch you during the course of the cure in a sexual way.
Momus: Trust me, I’m a Doctor (Don’t Stop the Night)
7. My name I don’t remember, though I hail from Ohio
I had a wife and family, good tyres on my car
What took me from my home and put me in the earth
Was the mouth of a deep dark hole I found behind my barn
The Handsome Family: The Bottomless Hole (Singing Bones)
8. The man she’d wanted all her life was hanging by a thread
– Leonard Cohen – Death of a Ladies Man (Alan)
9. Baby if you just say you care, I’ll follow you ‘most anywhere
– Mott the Hoople: Roll Away the Stone (CBQ)
10. I was in the best of health, thirsting for a beer
– Tommy MacKay: My Beautiful Ninja (John Impossible)
11. The comic book and me, just us we caught the bus.
The poor little chauffeur, though, she was back in bed
On the very next day, with a nose full of pus.
Bob Dylan: Yeah! Heavy! And a Bottle of Bread (Basement Tapes)
12. Why are you still crying? The pain is now through
Please forget those teardrops, let me take them from you
George Harrison: Behind That Locked Door (All Things Must Pass)
13. When the inspiration is above my station
Thoughts are melancholy and I let them pass
I tend to view this nation through the condensation
On a dirty glass
The Proclaimers: Misty Eyes (This is the Story)
14. Jesus, help me find my proper place
– The Velvet Underground: Jesus (Alan)
15. The natural cards revolve, ever changing
– The Incredible String Band: Koeeoaddi There (Alan)
16. The children are leaving school today
Mama said, don’t worry, I’ll be back one day
The blue men in uniform smiled and waved goodbye
She was hiding those tears in her eyes
John Cale: Taking Your Life in your Hands (Music for a New Society)
17. I met a woman, she’s spouting prose
She got luggage eyes and a Roman nose
Her body slung from side to side
‘Need a lift?’ She say Much obliged
Tyrannosaurus Rex: One Inch Rock (The Jeepster aka Mr McKay)
18. It’s carbon and monoxide, that old Detroit perfume
It hangs on the highways in the morning
and it lays you down by noon
Paul Simon: Papa Hobo (Paul Simon)
19. Trumpets – I can hear trumpets!
– Robert Fripp/David Byrne: Under Heavy Manners (CBQ almost right!)
20. So I sat in the attic, a piano up my nose
And the wind played a dreadful cantata.
Sore was i from a crack of an enemy’s hose
And the horrible sound of tomato.
Paul McCartney: Monkberry Moon Delight (Ram)
Go to it, and be thankful I’m not asking for the next line!
Free to download - Stories My Killer Told Me: Five surreal story-songs from my Edinburgh Fringe show.
- I Am Not The One For You
- The Ever Open Door
- New Eyes
- A Forest Trail in Autumn
- The Portobello Slam
Just let me send you an occasional email!