You ask, I answer

A couple of comments on my recent posts have asked one-word questions. How strange that people read this stuff at all, never mind ask for elucidation. But here is elucidation:
‘a blindfold?’ asks Tommy, noting its presence in the list of items provided by Scotrail in an effort to make me presentable the morning after a night in their sleeper. Yes, a small elasticated thing to go over your eyes, I don’t know what else to call it. Perhaps for people who couldn’t bear to have the light off in the compartment but need darkness to sleep. I don’t know. I did not use it.

‘the wrong clock?’ asks Alan about why I nearly missed the sleeper. This requires a longer answer, but not one that will greatly add to the immensity of human wisdom.  Last year Pestilence gave me a watch for Father’s Day. It has all the digital functions I like – a timer, a stopwatch and so on. One of its features I find less useful is that it has a button which switches it from summer time to standard time and back again. But this is a large button, and one which, if one’s hand is bent back to a certain angle, can be pressed accidentally. The only way to know you’re not on the ‘real’ time is a tiny, faint icon above the seconds. At some point that night I must have pressed it accidentally, perhaps putting it on after jujutsu,  so when I sat down to edit the video I thought it was about 9. It was only when I noticed the time in the corner of the computer screen that I realised it was after 10. There, that was exciting, eh?

Thank you both for making a space in your busy lives to ponder these questions. Bless you.

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Free to download - Stories My Killer Told Me: Five surreal story-songs from my Edinburgh Fringe show.



  • I Am Not The One For You
  • The Ever Open Door
  • New Eyes
  • A Forest Trail in Autumn
  • The Portobello Slam

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